In His Shoes

He holds it together during the school day.

He's the student who always has the answer, and always has something to say. But he tries his best to remember to raise his hand.

He worries a lot. We're working on that.

He worries about things he can't control. He worries about things he CAN control.

He worries.

He's happy. It's hard to tell, but he is. His meds just make him super focused so he looks upset all the time. It's been hard to get used to. He doesn't even smile in most pictures. I cherish the pictures where we catch him smiling.

He's a quick thinker.  Be prepared to take it as well as you dish it out with this one.

He's brutally honest. Don't ask him for his opinion on something unless you're prepared to hear the truth. Except about brushing his teeth - or changing his clothes. He'll lie about that. Every time.

Early mornings are so hard. Evenings and nights are hard too.  With no medication in his system, he has a very hard time following directions or being respectful.

We fail as parents nearly every day. Sometimes in the mornings, other times at night. Sometimes both times in one day. But we're trying.

Having a child with ADHD is hard.

Having a child with ADHD is a blessing.

Don't assume he's being naughty when he's acting out. Don't assume we aren't parenting him.

Don't assume.

Ask questions if you don't understand something about him.

Don't assume. Ask.

Disney World - 2013

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Uneccessary Inspiration

Okay moms, we've all been there.  The phone rings and it's someone you adore who says that they are on their way to your house for an impromptu visit.  You immediately go into "oh crap" mode once you hang up the phone, after of course reassuring said friend that you are thrilled that they are coming over.  You look around and wonder just where in the world you are going to put all of the unsightly clutter that you don't want your friend to see.  Far be it that she sees how you actually live, right?  Well, I am in that mode currently.  Not a great time for inspiration to strike!  But here I sit anyway, instead of racing around like the proverbial chicken with it's head cut off.

In my case, no one is coming to see us.  I am trying to get ready to leave home for eight days.  This daunting task is made even more complicated by the fact that the day after we return, the school year starts up again and my laid back summer schedule comes to a screeching halt.  So, on top of making sure we have enough clean laundry to pack, bills paid, garbage taken out, someone to watch the pets/house/plants, I am also having to do this under the radar so as not to tip off my very nosy children.

No.  They have NO IDEA we are taking a trip.  We have been planning and saving for this trip for over a year and we are set to leave the house by 10am TOMORROW MORNING.  I can't believe that we have made it this far with no one spilling the beans!  (SO HUSH!)

We are surprising them with a trip to Orlando, FL (Disney World!!) and Tampa, FL (Beaches!  Oh, and their Unlce, Aunt, and little Cousin too. LOL)

Am I ready for this trip?  Ummmm.  Hmmmm.  Depends on what you consider ready.

Are we packed?  Nope.  The hubby plans to take the kids swimming when he gets home from work so that I can do just that.  Do we have an itinerary?  Not really.  We have a small plan about which parks we are doing and when, but other than that we are just going to relax and enjoy.  Did we save up enough money?  Pretty much.  We are going to be able to have a great time, but we will have to watch our spending a little.  That seams reasonable to me though.  Did I lose those 20 extra pounds that was my goal when starting the planning for this trip?  Nope.  Sigh.  But. . .this trip is not about me. 

It's about seeing the kids' reactions tomorrow morning when we announce the trip to them.  (I can't wait to see their faces!)  It's about holding their hands during take off and landing and playing card games with them during the flight.  It's about how their faces are going to light up because of all of the magic that they are going to experience this next week.  But mostly it's about being together, as a family, for one last week of summer before the school year gets going full time and we have less and less time for each other.

So, if you see me on the first Monday of the school year, and I don't seem quite as chipper, put together, or alert as I normally am, please be kind.  I'm just coming down from a Florida high and my brain is still in vacation mode.  Poor me another cup of coffee, nudge me awake during the in-services that are usually so tantalizing, and don't be offended if I ask you to bring me another mojito.  I'm just confusing you with that cute cabana boy I met on the beach. ;)

Happy Trails!

Take Me Out to the Ballgame!

At one time in my life, softball WAS my life.  I loved everything about the game: the fielding, the batting, the sliding, the uniforms, giving my coaches gray hairs with the frequency that I stole bases, and most of all, the many, many friends I had because of the game.  But it wasn't until this year, watching my kids play ball, that I really understood just how invested my parents were during my playing days.

My mom once told me a story about how the first summer that they didn't have any of my games to go to anymore, she and my dad walked the dog down to the softball fields to watch a random game just because they missed being there.  My kids will play their last games of the season tomorrow night.  And while I will be glad for life to slow down a little bit, I am really going to miss watching them play.

Braden is six and in his last year of Tball.  Lauren is 8 and in her last year of coach-pitch softball. 

In Braden's league, the coach pitches to them several times, and if they can't hit it, they then use the tee.  Last year Braden couldn't hit the pitches to save his life, but this year he hasn't used the tee at all, and Jason has started pitching the ball faster and faster to him.  He has become such a great little ball player that he actually got asked to sub on a team a league up from tball!  And let me tell you, he really held his own!

But there is a down side to Braden being such a great ball player:  he's in Tball.  If you've never watched a tball game, you simply must.  It has got to be the funniest sport to watch.  For example, during the last game that Braden had his team was out in the field.  Braden was playing 2nd base, was down and ready, watching the batter.  His teammates were doing everything BUT getting ready: twirling, playing in the dirt, watching the sky, picking their noses.   His "coach" (I use that term loosely because she doesn't really coach them) yells out for them to be ready to throw it to first base.  The ball is hit to the cute little girl playing third, who has to stop twirling ballerina-style long enough to field the ball, bobbles it all around, seemingly not knowing what to do with it.  And then all I can hear is my boy yelling at her, "Throw it to first!  Throw it to first!  Throw it to first!"  His voice gets louder and more frustrated each time he yells it, going from being a helpful teammate to being downright disgusted with her existence.  She eventually throws it to first as best she can, overthrowing it of course, and Braden throws his hands up in the air like, "I give up."  So funny.  I wanted to tell him that I felt his pain. LOL  It's a good thing he will move up next year.

And then there's Lauren.  I have been so excited for Lauren to play softball because I loved the sport so much.  But part of me is very worried that she will never really be quite the player I've been hoping for. LOL  Don't get me wrong, she is quite good!  She has an arm on her that 11 year old boys have commented on when they've watched her throw, she fields hard hit balls like they were nothing, and her hitting has improved so much this summer that other parents have commented to me about what a good little player she is.  But it's always like her little mind is somewhere else.  In the clouds, daydreaming about who knows what.  In the dirt, drawing with the tip of her cleats.  Last game she was last batter and after rounding third to go to home all the players on the field started heading to their dugout, and Lauren just fell right into step with them...heading for their dugout!  Not HER dugout....THEIRS!  "Lauren!!", we called. "That's the wrong dugout!"  She just smiled and waved and continued on.  Finally you could see her figure it out, the "oops" registering on her face.  She smiled and laughed and headed to her dugout.  Sure, both teams were wearing red uniforms, but seriously?! LOL  Oh how I love that girl.

It's fun to watch them play different sports, and wonder just what sport they are going to remember as fondly as I remember my softball days.  Who knows, maybe in 10-12 years when my kids have left the nest, Jason and I will be walking the dog down to the ball fields to catch a game and reminisce. 

Sweet 16

For my 16th birthday my mom had my cake say: Sweet 16 and Never Been Kissed.  LOL  She's so funny. ;)  Anyway, I was reminded of that this weekend watching my daughter, her good friend, and a BOY hang out together for three days straight.  Oy.

Now, my daughter is only 8, so I hopefully have a long time before I have to worry about her kissing boys, but watching her this weekend I discovered that when the time comes I will be ready for it.

We went camping in Niobrara this weekend with two other families.  We had Braden (going into 1st), Morgan and Gavin (going into 2nd), Lauren, Josie, and Ethan (going into 3rd), and Cameron, Cole and Nolan who are 5th or 6th graders.  Lots of boys, and two lovely girls. 

Lauren, Josie, and Ethan were inseparable!  They went everywhere together!  They even formed a little club, where apparently the purpose of the club was to talk about things happening in their lives.  Sounds a little like therapy to me, but whatever.  They rode bikes, played in the sand, and just hung out.  It was cute.  The funniest part of it was that to us adults it was like watching a little love triangle.  Ethan and his girls.  LOL  But to them, they were just hanging out and having fun! 

One night when Josie, Lauren and I were huddled in the storm shelter (ugh), I got a chance to listen to them discussing boys.  Fortunately they still think boys are yucky and disgusting.  Even when I brought up Ethan, the decision was made that while they enjoyed hanging out with him and thought he was fun, he was still a disgusting boy.  LOL  That made my night.

Right now I have Lauren's trust and she talks to me about things.  I really hope this continues as she gets older.  I know that at some point she's not going to find boys nearly as disgusting as she does now.  And when that time comes I think that she might be ok talking to me about it.

Jason says that we're going to have to put her in a box with a hole in it until she turns 16.  And once she is 16 we will plug the hole. 

LOL.....dads.  :-)

From left to right: Ethan, Nolan, Lauren, Josie, Cole, Cameron, Morgan, Braden, Gavin

You Just Can't Make this Stuff Up!

The most wonderful part of Jason and me (yes, that is correct grammar) finding each other is that we can have fun together no matter what we are doing.  When we were first married we literally spent every Friday evening at WalMart.  Then, when we became home-owners we traded in WalMart for Menards/Lowe's/Home Depot. 

Another thing we started doing, even before we owned our own home, was to take in Sioux City's Home Show whenever it occurred.  We have learned from past experiences NOT to take the children to these events as they don't find it nearly as interesting or stimulating as we do. . .so when the latest Home Show occurred we got a babysitter.

Jason's only rule for me when going to these things is to NOT fill out ANY drawing forms of any kind.  What?!  He doesn't like free stuff, you ask?  Nope, not the case.  It seems like every time I have filled one out in the past, we have WON!!!  And by "won", I mean that someone has called the house, I answered, and "Oh my gosh Jason!  We won a cruise!!"  No, really, we "did!"  What? You ask.  You never heard about us going on a cruise?  Well, that's because we didn't.  See, when you "win" these things, it really means that while, yes, you won a cruise, you also have won the right to pay to get there, plus they want you to spend some time listening to a sales pitch and spend some of your hard-earned dollars on a vacation home that you didn't know you needed.  So, I am no longer allowed to "win" stuff. ;)

This time around I was a very good girl.  We looked at all of the cool ways to update our house, and made sure not to miss a booth.  And I only signed up for two things.....the main drawing as you walk in the door (we won a $50 gift card to a landscaping store....and it's legit) and a drawing to win an emergency kit at a booth filled with fire safety items (hey, we have to support our local fire fighters right?!)

As you can imagine, about a week later I got a call on my cell phone.  "Hi, can I speak to your mom or dad"" says the caller.  Hahaha!  I figured it was a telemarketer, so I handed the phone to Jason....he loves those calls. :)  He spoke to the caller for about five minutes and when he got off he said that it was someone from the fire safety booth at the Home Show.  We had won a safety kit!  The caller asked if he could drop it by that Friday, and also look around our house and give us some fire safety tips.  Sure!  Why not!  It sounded like something the kids would get a kick out of....a real, live, firefighter in our house!

So Friday comes and our appointment shows up.  Ummm, NOT a firefighter.  And it becomes quite apparent that he is also not from our local fire station either.  So, he comes in and gives us the safety kit, which he goes through with us to make sure we know what each part contains.  Then he has the kids walk him through the house, asking them questions about how they would get out in case of a fire.  He was very thorough and I was quite pleased with my kids' answers.  So far, so good, right? 

Then the kids get bored and go to play.  The gentlemen starts talking to us about our current smoke alarms.  He takes one down and essentially starts telling us how bad they are.  How most fire-related deaths occur because of faulty smoke alarms and how the ones we currently have fall into the category of the ones that fail.  So he brings out this binder FULL of newspaper articles of all these people, mostly kids, who have perished in these fires!  And I'm completely horrified!  OMG!  My kids are going to die in a fire and I am a horrible parent because we have these cheap smoke detectors and I am just never going to forgive myself if something happened to them!  So basically, this guy could sell me anything at this point.

Then he brings out matches, a piece of newspaper, and a glass jar.  He lights the paper on fire, blows it out, and drops it in the jar.  Then he holds our smoke detector up to it.  NOTHING HAPPENS!  OMG!  I can't believe I have lived in the house for SIX YEARS with these non-functioning smoke detectors!  Then, he brings out his product.  It's now been about an hour since he got here, but I don't even care that it's past the kids' bedtime because this man is going to help me save their lives!

He holds his smoke detector up to the jar that barely has any smoke left in it, and BAM!  It goes off like there's a three-alarm fire in the house.  HOOK.  LINE.  AND SINKER.  I'm in. 

He brings out that awful binder again, and now shows us articles about HIS product and how it has saved thousands of people over the years.  He asks us if we would like him to run the numbers and get to the bottom line of what it would cost us to have this life-saving system.  UH DUH!

$3,000.  That is what it would cost us to save our children's lives in the case of a fire.  $3,000 tonight.  Tonight.  Write him a check and we can get started thinking about our children's futures and not have to fear the worst.  Such a small price to pay for peace of mind right?  And my husband says, no thanks.  WHAT?!  ARE YOU NUTS!  DO YOU WANT OUR KIDS TO DIE!??  The fire safety gentleman can't believe it either!  He is just STUNNED that we are going to pass up this great opportunity!  And I am shooting my husband daggers.  I just can't believe that he'll be able to sleep in this house again, knowing that it's not safe.

So the man leaves.  And as Jason shuts and locks the door behind him he says, "Geez, I thought he'd never leave.  I'd almost rather the Kirby vacuum people came back than listen to him one more minute!"  (Ok, side note...that one was my fault too.  I let the Kirby people in one summer to give us a "free" carpet shampoo.  3 and 1/2 hours later.......)  I let him have it!  "I can't believe you wouldn't spend the money to keep your kids safe!"  And on, and on. and on.  He is just smiling at me.

Once I calm down, he explains to me why he is the logical one in the family, and picks apart every statement that the fire safety guy said....starting with the fact that our smoke detectors are not the same ones from any of the stories he told us about.  Jason goes online and searches out websites that do, indeed, back up what Jason is telling me.  Then, he shows me what it would cost for us to buy the same detectors and install them ourselves.  $400.  That's a LOOOONG way from $3000!

And that, my friends, is why Jason and I are so perfect for each other. :)

And darn that man for making me feel like such a horrible mother!

And ok, no more filling out drawing forms at home shows.

I Demand a Recount!

My mind must be on politics lately. . .gee, I wonder why!?  I had a "giggle moment" today that reminded me of that oh-so-famous recount of years past that took place during a particular presidential election year, and I just had to share it.

For those of you who don't know, my 5 year old son is in MY Kindergarten class this year.  Yep.  I am voluntarily teaching my own kid. . .and yes my district/school/principal (and son) are all fine with it.  It's been a little challenging already, because as most of you know, my son has always been a little challenging. His biggest issue has always been that he just has to learn everything the hard way!

There have been many moments during his short little life, that I have been venting to my husband/friend/mom/the Internet, about something that he had done, or not done.  Sometimes I question things about him:  Can he see ok?  Can he hear ok?  Does he have something diagnosable, like ADHD?  Or DMMTDS (Driving My Mom to Drink Syndrome) ?  Sometimes we just want answers right?!

So last night, I got on the Internet and googled: How do I know if my son has ADHD?  Just checking it out...seeing what I can find.  Ultimately the results said:  Stop being neurotic, he's just a 5 year old boy.  Okay...check!

Then today the audiologists from our district came around testing all of our students.  One of the gals doing the testing has been coming to my current school, and my school before this one, at least as long as I've been a teacher and so we "know" each other.  She caught me in the hallway today and told me that she'd had the pleasure of meeting my son.  She asked me if I had talked to him yet.  He was in Reading with my colleague, so I hadn't seen him for about an hour or so.  She said that she had told him to be sure and tell his mom that he had passed his hearing test with flying colors!

"SERIOUSLY!"  That was my response with my jaw hanging open.  And my thought was "I demand a recount!"  LOL

So. . .let's get this straight.  He HEARS me when I tell him to put his things away.  And he HEARS me when I tell him to brush his teeth.  And he HEARS me when I tell him to stop doing something, or start doing something.  So the real problem is that he is not LISTENING!

Okay little man.  I've got your number now.  Game on!

Urban Wildlife

When we were looking for a new house 5+ years ago, we stumbled upon the perfect place to build.  A corner lot, in town, but surrounded by trees, wild grasses, and lots of wildlife signs.  Perfect for a young, growing family who really wanted to live outside of town, but couldn't quite afford it yet.  Plus, there was only one other lot touching ours, which cuts down on the potential to close (physically) neighbors.  (But thank God for our close (in relationship) neighbors!)

We have been blessed with all of the wildlife that we get to observe.  A few weeks ago, these interesting creatures were hanging out right in our yard!

Look out turkeys!  This little guy is ready to hunt you!

Too bad these guys can't just hunt in our backyard!

We also see a LOT of deer!  They are currently not my favorite animals because they have been eating my new apple trees.  Grrr.  Here is a young buck that we saw during lunch today:

He looks like he's thinking about jumping my fence to get my apple trees.  STAY AWAY!

Otherwise, the wildlife is why we built here, and I guess they can stay. :)

Rainy Day with Children

My first thought when I saw the rain coming down this morning was, "Ugh.  What am I gonna do with the kids all day?"  There's the usual, unoriginal, sit them in front of a movie.  They were done with that by 9:30.

PANIC MODE!

So, I flipped on the creative switch in my head and came up with some great ideas.  I'm sure after reading this you will wish that you had known these ideas this morning, when it was raining, but now you can store them away in your brain for future rainy days!

Our first project was: COOKIES!  But not just ANY cookies. . .extremely colorful cookies.  I bought the cookie dough from a fifth grader at my school who was raising money for her dance troupe and have kept it in the freezer (and the idea in my back pocket) for a day just like this one.  Here are some pictures from our cookie-baking spree!

This is the cookie dough we used.  VERY colorful!  Sure glad I don't have to change diapers anymore!  LOL

Here are some of the items I let the kids use.  Lots of sprinkles, cookie cutters, rolling pins, etc.

Lauren's creations.

Braden working hard.

Braden's creations.

The cookies are ready to bake!

Once the kids were done, they decided on their own that they wanted to share their cookies with the neighbors.  They put some on plates and ran up and down the neighborhood delivering them. :)

The bakers!

While the cookies were baking, Lauren went off to do something in her room, but Braden chose to hang out with me and make: BANANA MUFFINS!

My little helper. Awwww!

Oh the smells coming out of my kitchen today!  Mmmmmmmmm!

All of the finished bakery items.

"Now what?" the kids wanted to know.  Hmmmm....ART PROJECTS!

First we painted designs onto coffee filters and let them dry.  This usually takes awhile, so I used a hairdryer to speed up the process!

Then we cut the coffee filters into flower shapes.  I had used some plain white paper to cut out some stencils of flowers.  The kids traced the flowers onto the back sides of the coffee filters and then cut them out.

Then we taped the flowers to the windows and started painting a scene.

Now I know what you are thinking:  YOU LET YOUR KIDS PAINT ON YOUR WINDOWS?!!

Yes.  :)

Simply mix a little bit of soap with acrylic paint and you are good to go.  It will wash off your windows, I promise. :)  Enjoy some pictures of the progress:

Finished front door!

Finished back door!

From start to finish, all of these projects took us roughly 6 hours...including clean up time.  Right now you're thinking that I managed to make a whole lot of cleaning work for myself today!

My sink FULL of dishes, paint brushes, cookie cutters, etc.

 And you would be correct.  I did a LOT of cleaning up today.  But was it worth it you ask?

Yes, THEY are. :)

My angels. :)

Guilty Pleasures

Mom guilt.

Ever had it?  C'mon....raise your hand...we've all been there.  And for those of you that know me well, Mom Guilt is my middle name.  Seriously...it is.  I have Mom Guilt in every little situation where I put myself first for even one moment in time.  Where does it come from you ask?  Because I have chosen to work.

Now, let's define "work."  I mean that I have chosen to work outside of the home.  I am clarifying this because, as I have said before, I totally support, adore, and put on pedestals, stay-at-home-moms.  Could I do what you do?  Sure! But should I?  Ohhhhh no!  Not in a million years!  You might be asking yourself, why?  Two words:

Day-time Television.  (Or should that be three words?)

Seriously.  If being a stay-at-home-mom meant sitting on my butt in front of the T.V all day long, eating when I want, what I want, and showering (maybe). . .I'm in. 

My name is Jocelyn, and I am a televisionaholic.  (Hi Jocelyn.)

Most of you know that last week my children were gone.  (Cheering!)  They spent the whole week at my wonderful in-laws' farm where they had loads of fun.  I blogged about all the cleaning I got done during their absence.  But what I failed to mention was what else I did during that week.  (Dramatic pause. . .)

(Little known fact about me.)

I have a secret guilty pleasure.  It drives my husband nuts.  Eye-rolling nuts!

I LOVE teeny-bopper shows.  ANY show geared towards teens to early 20's, count me in!  Some of my current guilty pleasures that I watch EVERY time they are on (or DVR to watch later):
*Secret Life of the American Teenager
*Pretty Little Liars
*Bunheads (new show that just started)

So, last week I discovered that the channel SoapNet shows reruns of Beverly Hills 90210!  (Squeal!)  I know!  Awesome right?!  Right?!  No?  Well, I like it.  And I sat on my butt and watched it every single day of my kid less week.  And enjoyed every minute of it!

So THIS week, my kids are back and my guilty pleasure has to wait.  Or does it?  I have discovered that I can watch some of it if I am doing something else while the kids are playing.  I can get them started on something and go clean the kitchen while watching Brandon and Kelli ALMOST get married.  Then I can fold some laundry while Donna helps Noah get through ANOTHER crisis.  But ultimately a child will come into the room and I have to quickly click the off button before he or she gets an eye-full, and sweetly ask said child what they need.

Yesterday was a time where I felt especially guilty with Mom Guilt.  I was caught by my son with the kitchen spotless, sitting at the table with my coffee, and watching while the whole crew threw Brandon a going away party.  My youngest looked at me with the sweetest of faces and asked: "Mommy?  Will you read me one of my library books?"  Oh no....what do I do now?  My show was at a very pivotal moment!  I was about to see if Brandon actually leaves Beverly Hills to go to Washington, D.C. to work at their prestigious paper! And Donna and Noah were on the verge of breaking up....again!  And Valerie. . .well, don't even get me started on that one!

I would never get this moment back!

Best library book I ever read. :)

UPDATE

This post is for those of you that read my blog to feel better about your own parenting skills and children.  Yesterday I blogged about my kids not listening to me or following my rules.  Well, today the chaos continues.

We live on a pretty quiet street.  There is not much traffic, and we live on a corner that has a stop sign.  So, yes, I am one of those mother's who lets their kids play outside in the front yard without too much supervision.  But, we have rules.  If I am not out there, they are not allowed to cross the street, or ride their bikes in the street.

Lauren "forgot" these rules today.  So, I gently reminded her of them.  She came inside a little while later and asked if she could go to the neighbor's house across the street to our corner and see if their granddaughter could come over to play.  I said sure, but that she needed to walk over there, NOT ride her bike.

And then I stood at the window and watched her RIDE HER BIKE to the neighbor's house! 

Can you see the steam that came out of my ears?

I waited patiently until she came back and called her inside.  Taking the advice of my sister, I handed her a box of Clorox wipes and told her to make her bathroom spotless.  She, of course, asked why.  When I told her that I had been watching her break two rules (riding in the street, and riding her bike to the neighbor's when I had explicitly told her not to), she made no excuses, didn't whine, she just grabbed the wipes and headed to the bathroom.

She came out a few minutes later and said she was done.  I half-smiled and said, "The toilet too."

She shares a bathroom with her 5 year old brother who has terrible aim.  She will learn a good lesson today! LOL

Real Kids vs Robots

Why is it that kids won't listen?!  I mean, really.  How hard is it to listen to what their parents are telling them, and then to (gasp) do it?!  This is what I am currently struggling with.

I am a teacher.  All day long I get paid to tell kids what to do, and they listen to me.  I can command a whole gymnasium full of elementary school aged kids, but my own children act like they don't hear me.

Now, we may not have this whole parenting thing figured out, but we are at least consistent.  If we say we are going to do something, we do it.  If we talk about a consequence that will happen, it gets enforced.  So why is it that my children continually defy me?

Take today, for example.  We were shopping at Target for a birthday present for one of my daughter's friends, and some Father's Day cards.  The kids were being pretty well behaved.  My son wanted to sit in the cart.  Then he wanted out of the cart.  Then he wanted in the cart again.  I told him that if he got inside the cart, he wasn't getting back out.  So what happens?  Of course, he wants out again.  And now he's whining, and trying to embarrass me into letting him out. Nothing doing.  Then I turn my back to read a card, and his sneaky sister helps him get out!  Grrrr.  Then she says that she is getting in the cart.  I said, no, you are too old to be riding in a shopping cart and you'll smoosh the items in the back.  Once again, I'm distracted by something, and in the cart she climbs.  So now she has earned herself a time out for not listening to me.

Now she's mad, so she's going to make my life miserable in the checkout lane.  She opens up the pop cooler and takes out a bottled water.  I say, no, put it back and close the cooler.  Immediately her little brother puts his hand on the cooler door to open it.  I say, "B, if you open that you will have a time out too.  I just told your sister not to touch it."  So, he opens it when he thinks I'm not looking and then tries to deny it.  So now HE also has earned a time out.  And he proceeds to throw a fit about it.  In the middle of Target.  Lovely.
Right about now I'm starting to think that military school sounds pretty good.

On the ride home all I keep hearing from the peanut gallery is "Why do we have to sit in time out?"  I'm thinking DUH!  But I calmly explain that they made the choice to not listen to what I told them to do, or not to do.  It was their choice to have a consequence, not mine.  I explained that when I ask them to do something, or not to do something, I am merely trying to keep them safe and healthy and that by defying me they are putting themselves in danger.  The whining continues, because of course they are not really listening to me.  I go into "ignore mode."

This is the point at which I start to wish that I had more obedient children.  But then again, I'm torn.  Do I really want to raise robots?  Robots that do what I say when I say it and don't question anything?  At times, yes! But I also want my children to learn to question things and to make up their own minds about things.   But we don't get to pick and choose when our kids get to question and when they don't.  I guess the best we can hope for is that when it really matters they will listen.  And until then we will wear out the kitchen timer with our time outs.

Party Time!

Each summer since my youngest was about 15 months old, my wonderful in-laws have taken the kids for a week.  I absolutely live for this week each year.  It gives me a chance to relax, read, and ready myself for a summer being a stay at home mom.  However...I have never really learned how to relax during this week off.  I always seem to have projects in mind that I want to get done.  This summer's project was cleaning and organizing the kids' rooms.  And getting rid of about half of their "stuff." 

Now, I'm not saying that ALL I did was clean and organize!  I also mowed the lawn, went to the gym, did some things for next school year, and rearranged the furniture.  I know, I know.  I really know how to party right?  LOL

I did manage to sleep in, stay in my PJ's until about noon each day, and get my hubby to take me out to eat each night.  See?  I DO know how to relax!

For your viewing pleasure, here are some before and after pictures of the kids' closets:

Lauren's closet "after."

Lauren's closet "before."

Braden's closet "before."

Braden's closet "after."

 




































Yes, their rooms were a PIT!  As was the play room.  I didn't take any pictures of the play room, before or after, because, well, I forgot.  But, I DO have pictures of all the "stuff" I am getting rid of!

This is the "stuff" that I am giving to the church rummage sale.  No, NOT the wine....THAT is for me thankyouverymuch!!

This is the "stuff" that we are taking to our niece.  I am sure that she is going to love every bit of it.  I'm just not so sure that her mom and dad will ever forgive me!!!

Not only did I get rid of the kids' things, I am also taking about 7 garbage bags full of MY "stuff" to the Good Will.  It's mostly clothes I don't wear and old towels that we don't use.  Nothing too exciting, but I am so thrilled to get rid of it all!

It's very therapeutic to get rid of clutter.  And I get positively giddy about closet organizers!  Silly right?  Ah well, whatever makes you happy, right?  I have found a lot of organization ideas on Pinterest .  I also read a lot of other mom's blogs.  One of my favorites, besides my sister's wonderful blog, is this one written by another mom who is fabulous with organization.  She has become my inspiration, mostly because she seems to have it all together.  Although, being a mom, I know that this is not true and that makes me happy because I know that I can also appear to have it all together!

Well, it is now almost 12:30 and I am still in my lounge wear.  Time to get dressed and do something with my life on my last day sans kids.  Maybe I'll go clean something else?! LOL

Congratulations

Nothing, and I mean nothing, can prepare you for parenthood. 

Recently a coworker announced that she was expecting.  And all the women in the room, mostly moms, said cute things like, "wow, how exciting," and "Oh! Yay!"  Why is it that all us other moms, us more-experienced moms, don't clue the new mom in on what to really expect?  Is it because we think that they should just figure it out like we had to?  Is it because, well, they're already expecting so now they're stuck learning all of those little "lessons" anyway?  No one asks other moms before they're expecting how parenthood really goes.  And come to think of it....if we really knew, and I mean, REALLY knew....would we still do it???

My answer?  Yes.  Absolutely.

I remember bringing Lauren home for the first time.  We had just spent three days in the hospital after her birth where you have all these nurses, doctors, and aides talking you through every little thing that happens.  They tell you when to feed her, how to feed her, how to change her, how to bathe her, how to dress her, how she should sleep, etc.  Then they wheeled us outside, helped us get into the car and wished us luck.  Jason and I seriously looked at each other as we pulled away from the hospital and said, "So, I guess we just leave then?"  We were on our own with this little person, and no doctors, nurses, or aides to talk us through the ins and outs of our days with her!  It was the most bizarre feeling to be suddenly on our own and totally responsible for another life.

And then they grow up.  They grow up and learn new things and go through new stages, and at each step you are asking yourself if you are doing this right.  Am I feeding them the right foods, are we reading the right books, is my discipline strategy working the way I want it to?  And just when you think you've got it figured out....BAM!  Their teacher calls you in the middle of the day and you are right back at square one!

Sigh.

Your children are going to disappoint you.  They are going to anger you.  They are going to make you cry.  They are going to make you say things in your mind that you NEVER thought you'd say.  And sometimes you are going to handle these little setbacks correctly, and sometimes you are going to yell.

But, your children are also going to make you proud.  They are going to make you smile.  They are going to make you laugh.  They are going to make you cry happy tears.  They are going to do something that makes you realize that all of your hard work is actually paying off.

Those are the moments that we are thinking about when we tell that new mom "congratulations."  We know that she is going to be ok, because WE are ok.  We don't have to tell her about all the not-so-fun stuff that comes with parenting.  We just need to be there for her when she's going through it.  If for nothing else, but to tell her a story that makes her current situation seem less awful.

Weekends

I am NOT Superwoman, or Supermom or anything "super" for that matter.  But, I try to do my best to balance my life on the weekends.  It's a difficult job to be "mom," "housekeeper," "entertainer," and SANE!  My weekends are so full, mostly because I have chosen to be a working mom.

On Saturdays we have to play catch up from our work week.  There is laundry to do, bathrooms to clean, floors to be vacuumed and scrubbed, and grocery shopping to be planned for and completed.  This long list of time-consuming tasks are only made more difficult to finish when one parent is absent.

Jason has a play date with one of his buddies today.  They are currently fishing on a little lake with their bows and arrows trying to win a fishing tournament.  Don't ask me why this is fun, I will never understand it.  They are fishing for large carp-like fish that are not native to our area, but were introduced to our lakes and rivers after the Missouri flooded our area last summer.  I'm not sure if the contest is decided by the amount of fish they catch or by the weight of the fish, but either way these are not fish that this family will be eating. ;)

At any rate, since Jason is off having, what he calls, "fun" with his friend, I am tasked with completing our Saturday "to-do lists" by myself.  Well, not really.  I have two "helpers" to involve as well.  Ha!  So this is how our Saturday is going at this point:

• "Sleep in."  Check.  (If your idea of sleeping in is having two kids in your bed watching Phineas and Ferb while you try to snooze through their giggling.)
• Get up, throw on some clothes and go get donuts and COFFEE!  Check.  Awesome donuts by Jitters, and a large coffee later I am more prepared to take on my day of single parenting.
• Come home and play on the Internet.  What?!  I had to check out the worlds of Facebook, Pinterest, Zulily, Crazy 8, other blogs I follow, and then updating my own.  I swear that this is how Saturdays are supposed to go....really!
• Help Lauren clean up the finger nail polish remover she spilled all over the kitchen floor....check.  Shhhh.....don't tell Jason!  He would ban all girly products from the house for sure!!!  If the wood floor starts looking a little lighter in that area I will blame it on all of the sun that comes through our kitchen windows and maybe, finally, get the new flooring I want anyway!  LOL
• Explain to Braden that he is not, in fact, a lion tamer and that Sadie (our dog) is not, in fact, a lion and that if he actually hits her with that leash then I get to play the part of the tamer and HE gets to be the lion!  (Don't call DHS, I won't actually hit him with the leash, but HE doesn't know that so this comment works for getting him to take a step back from the dog.  Hey, don't judge me, SHE was my FIRST child, so naturally my favorite!  LOL)
• Now, on to the rest of my day.  This is what we have in store:
• Laundry - What this consists of at our house is getting it all clean, piling it up on our chair in the living room, and folding it a few days in the future.  Then a few days after that we will actually put away the piles that are left, and refold the piles that we have been rifling through for days on end looking for clean clothes to wear to work and school.
• Vacuum and Clean Floors - Sounds pretty straight-forward right?  I should mention that I hate vacuuming stairs so I pay my 5 year old $1 to do it for me. LOL  And I am too lazy to sweep the kitchen and bathroom floors, so those get vacuumed too.  And maybe not mopped today....we will see how things go.
• Dusting....hahahahahahaha!  Yeah right!
• 1:15 movie of Chimpanzee.  This has been requested by my slaves children for a nice break in our day.  I am thinking that I will not eat lunch today so that I can eat a whole bunch of movie theatre popcorn with out all of the guilt. :)
• After the movie we need to kick our cleaning into high gear before the man of the house returns and asks, "Huh...sooooo, what did you guys DO today?" as he looks around the house that really isn't much cleaner than when he left.  

And if he were to actually say that, then HE would get to enjoy a weekend of single-parent activities very soon!!

Enjoy your weekends everyone.  Take some time to be silly with your kids, make a few messes, make a few memories, and maybe get your laundry put away. :)

Short-Order Cook

With the birth of our daughter, Lauren, we became first time parents.  As first time parents we made lots of mistakes and learned lots of lessons.  Seeing as how that was over 7 years ago, and both of our children are happy and healthy, I think we're doing an ok job.

Lauren was an exceptionally easy baby/toddler/little girl, and still to this day she doesn't stress us out too much.  But one "phase" she did go through, which I believe to be very common with kids, is a picky-eater phase.  There was a time, when she was eating solid foods pretty well, that she would only eat certain things.  She went through a phase where I swear the only thing keeping her alive was crackers.  Then there was the hot dog phase.  And finally, the chicken nuggets phase.  Just about the time that I considered saying something to her doctor about it, she would get over that particular phase and move on to something else.

Now, being a relatively new mom, I got a little tired of unsolicited advice, so when my child was going through something that I knew wouldn't kill her, I didn't say much about it to anyone.  Looking back, that was stupid.

I remember having a conversation with one of the smartest moms I know (my sister!).  I happened to offhandedly mention that I was tired of Lauren's phase she was in at that time, probably the chicken nugget phase.  My sister, who has always been great about not judging my parenting skills, managed to slip in a comment that didn't offend me, it actually made a light bulb go on in my head.  She said something to the effect that her kids have had to learn that she is NOT a short-order cook and if they don't eat what she has made for supper, they go to bed hungry.  Wow.  Now that was awe-inspiring!

I remember putting that theory to the test not long after that conversation.  Lauren was probably about 3 at the time and most likely made some disparaging comments, or bawled about what was for supper.  So instead of making her something that she would eat, I calmly put her to bed.  Lesson learned in ONE night.  She has never had to go to bed hungry again, and I can cook ONE meal each night.

Enter little brother Braden.

He has never been an easy child.  And he is a bit of a picky eater.  Over the years I have done a pretty good job of making meals that everyone likes, or that contain at least one healthy element that everyone likes.  Braden has heard the story a couple of times about when his sister had to go to bed hungry.  We have used it as motivation for eating his meal.  It has worked every time.

Braden's problem is different.  He will take one look at the meal that I, or my husband, have prepared and deem it gross, or "bisgusting" and tell us that he is not going to eat it.  But more times than not, he ends up eating enough of the meal that we are happy.  Tonight started out feeling a LOT like the night we sent Lauren to bed hungry.

I tried a new recipe (very rarely is this a good idea with small children).  Both of my kids made the "disgusting" face just looking at it. Lauren was easy to convince to eat it after I explained that all that was in it was chicken, veggies, and stuffing.  Braden still refused to eat it.  So, we recounted the story about Lauren getting sent to bed hungry.  He still refused to eat it.  We took the "ignore" approach.  Meaning, we ignored his whining and just ate our meal.  When he realized that no one cared that he wasn't eating, he poked a piece of chicken and put it in his mouth.  Then he says:

"Huh....Mom!  You're right!  This IS good!"

Seriously!?  And THAT was worth the 30 minute fit and refusing to eat?  Good grief.

A day in my life...

For those of you who don't yet have children, or who have children who are younger, this is what you have to look forward to:

There will come a day when your children are in early elementary school when you figure that they are old enough to be left to their own devices while you take a shower.  You will get them settled at the kitchen table, coloring nicely.  You will set the ground rules: "No answering the door. No answering the phone.  If you need me I will be in the shower."  They will say "ok mom" and into the shower you will hop.

Then it happens.  You will be just about to rinse the shampoo from your hair when you hear the blood-curdling scream of "Moooooooommmmmmyyyyyy!"  The thoughts that go through your mind first are: Where is the hand gun and where is my cell phone?  You will jump out of the shower, stubbing your big toe on the shower door, run out the bathroom door, slipping and sliding all the way.  You arrive in the kitchen with a hand gun in one hand, the emergency response team on your phone in the other, shampoo dripping into your eyes, and nothing on but your birthday suit.  Then your child will look at you and say:

"Never mind, I found the red crayon."

Bad Mommy Moments

Do you ever have one of those days when you just really suck at being a parent?  Today is my sucky Mommy day.

Our school makes a big deal out of having good attendance.  One of the ways we show our appreciation to the kids and their families for getting their kids to school on time, every day, is by having monthly perfect attendance breakfasts.  Last month Lauren's dad took her, and this month she asked if I would take her.

Today we were running late because Jason was out of town for work, so it was just me getting the kids around and out the door in the morning.  This never ends well, and usually one of us ends up in tears.  Today I thought I had done a pretty good job, despite the fact that we had no milk in the house for breakfast.  No matter, we were out the door in plenty of time to stop at Casey's for some donuts. (Which totally makes up for not feeding my kids at home right?)  I dropped the kids at the daycare that walks them to school for me, and went on my way and on with my morning routine.  Then I see Lauren at my classroom door.

For those of you who don't know, I teach in Spanish every day, all day long, and when Lauren comes to my room for one thing or another she is expected to speak to me in Spanish.  So today she says: "Mama, hoy es el dia de Perfect Attendance......" and proceeds to break down crying.  Oh pobrecita!  I feel about THIS big (picture me practically squeezing my fingers together to represent how tiny I feel)!

I made all sorts of promises of taking her out for a special breakfast, letting her come to the craft fair with me tomorrow, etc.  Finally, I asked her if she wanted to call her dad to tell him what a horrible mom I am.  So......she did.  Somehow, hearing all those promises from him made her feel better....and me feel worse.  But who can blame her right?  I had let her down.  Lesson learned. :(

Sugar Free Gum

Have you ever had that experience where something you eat, see, hear, or smell brings forth an instant memory?  I had a bizarre one today.


Lauren and I took a quick trip to Wal-Mart (groan) during half time of the Husker game.  She had written us a list so that we wouldn't forget all of the "important" things we were there for.  Well, a half hour later we left after paying way too much money for too few of items.  I don't know about the rest of you, but I can't ever get out of Wal-Mart (groan) for less than $100. . .regardless of what I'm there for.

So, we got in the van and were headed on our way when Lauren asked for a piece of the gum she had talked me into.  Our rules about gum are pretty simple: it must be sugar-free, and you are allotted one piece of gum per day.  I dug some out for her and asked her to get a piece out for me too.  Enter, THE MOMENT.

I popped that piece of gum in my mouth and was instantly transported to my childhood doctor's office.  Dr. Mortimer always gave us a piece of sugar-free bubble gum at the end of every checkup.  And this gum tasted exactly like the gum he always gave us.  Weird.  I don't actually have a specific memory that comes to mind, just the overall feeling of leaving his office with that gum in my mouth.

I remember Dr. Mortimer as being a very kind doctor, but a little "old school" looking back.  Of course, what we might consider "old school" now, was probably very with-the-times then!  When we would go in for our school/sports physicals he would actually tap our knees with that funny triangle shaped hammer thing that I have NEVER seen our doctor use on my kids.  And he actually used those nasty tasting tongue depressors to check the back of your throat as you stuck out your tongue and said "Ahng."  (No, that's NOT a typo....you try saying "ah" with your tongue out and a wooden tongue depressor pressing down on it!  It comes out "ahng.")Speaking of those tongue depressors; maybe I have Dr. Mortimer to "thank" for my strong gag reflex and my sensitivity to textures in foods.  Hmmmm.

Who would have thought that a silly little piece of sugar-free bubble gum could bring back such vivid memories.  I wonder if he's on Facebook?  LOL

Potty Training

For those of you who know me well, you are probably wondering why in the world I am posting about potty training when my children are 4 and 1/2 and almost 7 years old!  The type of potty training I am referring to is not the conventional kind one thinks of when one becomes a parent.

By "conventional" I simply mean "parent training" where your young child trains YOU to take her potty every hour on the hour until she "gets it."  No, the type of potty training I am talking about today is a much more important kind dealing with a parent's sanity.

In my line of work I deal with young children, which means all day long I am burdened with repeating myself 20 times, getting asked questions after every statement I make, dealing with puke, other bodily fluids, and my personal favorite....boogers.  Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love my job as a kindergarten teacher!  My sanity, however, has a very hard time keeping up when, at the end of a long day, I come home to the same behaviors and bodily fluids I have been dealing with all day long at work.

Which brings me to the topic of "potty training."

When my children were infants I was not one of those mothers who was scared to death of germs, or of people holding my babies without washing their hands, or one of those mothers who had to do everything herself.  But there was one thing that I did that I now find to have been very stupid.  Whenever I decided to get cleaned up for the day, I wouldn't ask anyone to watch my infant while I showered even if someone else was in the house with me.  I would simply bring them into the bathroom with me, sitting in their bouncy seat, and enjoy their cooing with I bathed.  As the kids got older, they may not have stayed in the bathroom with me, but we have always had an open, or unlocked, door policy where our bathroom is concerned.  Which brings me to the present day.

I was stupid to have invited my children into the bathroom with me at all.

For those of you who have seen the kids' movie: Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Roderick Rules, you will know, and can relate to, the scenes which I am about it describe.  In the movie, the boys' parents leave them alone for a weekend in the house with the instructions that no one is allowed over while they are away.  Of course the boys don't listen and they end up having a party.  (A pretty tame one really, which was nice to see in a movie, that consisted of too much pop, food, and loud music.)  The next day their parents let them know that they are coming home early, so the boys scramble to get the house cleaned up.  They are very proud of the job they have done, until they walk by the bathroom door and realize that one of their friends has written Roderick Rules in permanent marker on the outside of the door.  They rush to the basement, where conveniently there is an extra door stored, and change it out.  Then they realize that while the original bathroom door had a lock on it, the new one in fact does not!

Everything is fine until their dad has to use the bathroom.  He can be heard commenting: "Hey, didn't this door have a lock on it?  Huh, I must be losing my mind.  Oh well."  The boys sigh with relief.  Then their mom uses the bathroom.  She, of course, notices that there is no lock.  She confronts the boys, who try to convince her that there never was a lock, to which she responds: "Don't try to tell me that this door never had a lock on it!  I KNOW it had a lock on it!  Sometimes during the day the only solace I get is from going into this room, locking the door, and tuning all of you OUT!"  (Or something to that affect.)

I can TOTALLY relate to that mom's rant.  There are times during my day when I invent reasons to go to my bathroom and lock the door.  But my kids are too smart.  They will stand outside my door and berate me with questions, or knock on the door because they think it's funny to hear their mom scream at them, I guess.  Well, no more.  We are going back to basics.....Potty Training 101.

The children are no longer allowed in our bedroom, which will also help with tripping over their toys in the middle of the night.  And now when I go to use the bathroom (IE, escape from my children) I not only lock the bathroom door, I also close and lock my bedroom door.  Then I close and lock my bathroom door, turn on the fan and sometimes the water, and relish in the quiet oasis that is now my bathroom.

Strange?  Yes.  Necessary for my sanity?  Absolutely!